Felix Toombs — Transcripts — Veronica Mars Investigations

Posts tagged Felix Toombs

VMI 2.17 Plan B transcript

JOY: Why on god's green earth does this show refuse to show me anybody doing reps that I would like to watch doing reps? Why is this our fate? Here's a list of people that could do reps at any point on the show: Wallace; Cliff...
HZ: Cliff would be hilarious. Cliff would do it in like a white undershirt and some massive blue boxers and black business socks. And a tie.
JOY: And that would be fine. I would like to watch Lilly Kane do some reps...
HZ: Oh, yeah. Alicia doing reps.
JOY: Oh hell yes. Weevil...
HZ: I don't think I'd want to see Weevil doing reps. It just doesn't seem like his thing, like he'd rather be alone whilst he's exercising.
JOY: Oh, OK, well whatever Weevil wants, obviously.

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod18 August 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Weevil Navarro, Francis Capra, Molly Fitzpatrick, Annie Campbell, Felix Toombs, Brad Bufanda, Bev, Furonda Brasfield, Kyle Gallner, Cassidy Casablancas, Beaver, Tina Majorino, Mac, Cindy Mackenzie, Tessa Thompson, Jackie Cook, Thumper, James Molina, Fitzpatricks, Gia Goodman, Krysten Ritter, Steve Guttenberg, Woody Goodman, Jane Kuhne, Valorie Curry, Danny Boyd, Taylor Sheridan, Patrick Wolff, Hector, Martin Yu, Mr Wu, Linda Castro, Mrs Murphy, Curly Moran, David Bitterman, Liam Fitzpatrick, Rod Rowland, Deputy Sacks, Brandon Hillock, Luis, Easy Rider, essay contest, Shark Field, explosives, explosions, detonation, murder, witnesses, Felix’s murder, breakups, shocker, reps, sweat, argyle, Caligula, urinals, chloroform, assault, battery, Bible, swearing in, oaths, ANTM, America’s Next Top Model, River Stix, River Styx

VMI 2.16 The Rapes of Graff transcript

JOY: Has anyone ever puked on you in a romantic setting?
HZ: No.
JOY: Good. Hey, that's good.
HZ: Have they puked on you in a romantic setting?
JOY: Hell, no, I don't think so.
HZ: Don't think I've been puked on. A friend of mine at school puked in a jigsaw box at my house. That was unfortunate.
JOY: Ugh.
HZ: And two different friends puked in my mother's wellington boots.
JOY: What? On different occasions?
HZ: Yes.
JOY: Or like one per boot, at different times?
HZ: Different times.
JOY: Why? Why there?
HZ: I don't think you can really accurately find out from someone that is drunk enough to puke into a boot.
JOY: OK. Was the second person aware that the first person had done it at an earlier point? Was it a copycat puking? Or no?
HZ: I don't think, again, if you're in a state where you're going to puke in a boot, that you have the presence of mind to think, "Oh, I'll make it a callback."
JOY: OK, OK, OK. You might be surprised, Helen, what people are capable of.

Season 2, transcriptVMI Pod11 August 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Troy Vandegraff, Aaron Ashmore, Hannah Griffith, Jessy Schram, Daran Norris, Cliff McCormack, Sheriff Lamb, Don Lamb, Michael Muhney, Danny Boyd, Taylor Sheridan, Mrs Murphy, Linda Castro, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Michael Cera, Alia Shawkat, Arrested Development, Hearst College, Madison Sinclair, Amanda Noret, Zach McNees, Felix’s murder, Felix Toombs, rape, sex crime, Torrance High School, vomit, puke, sick, Roman numerals, Dean, Drew, Chip, jerks, awful white boys of Neptune, Sugar Jones, sex workers, sex, sexpeople, cake, Ozzy Osbourne, boarding school, Woody Goodman, essay contest, blowing shit up, Shark Field, explosives, detonation, Fitzpatricks

VMI 2.15 The Quick and the Wed transcript

JOY: Here's some stuff that we find out that I don't care about: she had her ex-boyfriend's name tattooed on her ass after two weeks, then she got it removed, which took six weeks, so that the guy that she's getting married to would never see it, and also one of them lost her cellphone last night, and there was a guy creeping around them at the Happy Horseshoe. Here is what we find out that I do care about: they went to an all-male revue called "Packaged Meat".
HZ: Ew.
JOY: Ha! Helen! Get on my level. This is so great. This is wonderful news.
HZ: I suppose, any of the genders in revue, I'm a little uncomfortable with them.
JOY: Well, I guess this is where you and I, our paths diverge, and I take the winding road into the strippergram forest, searching for elusive woodland hunks to pop out, being granted modesty by strategically-placed fig leaves and branches, and that's just not what you're after.
HZ: It's quite the bucolic scene of male nudity and moss and branches and things.
JOY: Come on!

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod28 July 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Jane, Jane Kuhne, Valorie Curry, Hannah Griffith, Jessy Schram, Vinnie Van Lowe, Ken Marino, Aaron Echolls, Harry Hamlin, Kendall Casablancas, Charisma Carpenter, Cassidy Casablancas, Beaver, Kyle Gallner, Heidi, Virginia Williams, Rick Peters, Dr Tom Griffith, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Daran Norris, Cliff McCormack, Sheriff Lamb, Don Lamb, Michael Muhney, Arturo, Michael Ausiello, Mr Pope, Michael Kostroff, Nick, Brad Ashten, bus crash, explosives, Terrence Cook, wedding, marriage, faxes, missing bride, family, engagement ring, engagement, karaoke, Felix’s murder, Felix Toombs, Phoenix Land Trust, Hannibal Lecter, prison, Clarice Starling, Easy Rider, Duncan Kane, CONDOMS, plea bargains, incorporation, bachelorettes, bachelorette party, hen party, sex Roomba, Neptune Onlyplace, Pirates of Penzance, Gilbert and Sullivan, Gollum, melon, strippers, bowling, bands, musicians

VMI 2.14 Versatile Toppings transcript

JOY: When Lamb is clearly going to be difficult, and Keith hands him the CD to essentially blackmail him, Lamb crosses his fingers and says, "I really hope it's the new Big & Rich." Helen, do you know, are you familiar with the musical artists Big & Rich?
HZ: I'm not, Jenny. Should I?
JOY: Well, they are, I think, best-known for their country smashola ‘Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy’.
HZ: That doesn't work.
JOY: That's about sex. ‘Have sex with a cowboy.’
HZ: "Don't fuck a horse," OK, what a message.
JOY: Listen! You have to hold two layers in your mind at the same time. "Don't ride a horse regular. Instead, fuck a cowboy."
HZ: "Take a cowboy to the races, and see if they can handle the jumps"?
JOY: Just make sure you only have one headphone in at any time.
HZ: I just don't think this analogy works, Jenny.
JOY: Helen, I feel like you're missing the spirit of modern American country music.

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod21 July 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Hannah Griffith, Jessy Schram, Terrence Cook, Jeffrey Sams, Tom Griffith, Rick Peters, Tessa Thompson, Jackie Cook, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Kristin Cavallari, Kylie, Lucas Grabeel, Kelly Kuzzio, Carmen Ruiz, Natalia Baron, Tina Majorino, Mac, Cindy Mackenzie, Corny, Jonathan Chesner, Sheriff Lamb, Don Lamb, Michael Muhney, Madison Sinclair, Amanda Noret, Ryan, Bradford William Anderson, Marlena, Arturo, Leonard Lobo, Gil Birmingham, Deputy Sacks, Brandon Hillock, extortion, gambling, debt, bus crash, Felix’s murder, Fitzpatricks, Felix Toombs, LGBTQ+, pizza, taser, muggings, blackmail, gay, lesbian, LGBTQIA, queer, outing, coming out, outed, rims, cars, explosives, helicopter, Woody Goodman, Laguna Beach, casino, websites, messageboards, forums, pirate shit, Cho’s Pizza, za, chatrooms, Pirate SHIP, secrets, printouts, strawberry soda, The Human Centipede, phone, caller ID, Starsailor, Bentley, Flintstones car, Big & Rich, alibis

VMI 2.13 Ain't No Magic Mountain High Enough transcript

HZ: Jackie's shivering. It's so cold, this is so wrong. And then fucking Madison is there missing the balls, so she just goes over to the lever and she's like, "I told you to stay home," and dunks Jackie with the lever, which is so horrible. And the teacher who wouldn't let Wallace misthrow balls is just like, "Yeah, whatever, sure." And Veronica has a face of concern. But does she do anything? No.
JOY: You know, Helen, in my elementary school, we had a summer festival thing where our principal was in the dunk tank, and I, some way or another, won the privilege of being the first person to get to throw balls to try to dunk my principal, and I missed all three times. And then I did what Madison did, but in a fun way. But watching Madison do this really made me call into question my fifth grade mentality.
HZ: Isn't the point there that the hierarchy is temporarily suspended or subverted?
JOY: Yes.
HZ: Whereas this, it's someone in a superior position in pretty much every way in society being a real shit to someone else.
JOY: Thank you for making me feel better, Helen.
HZ: Yeah.
JOY: About me, not about this episode.

Season 2, transcriptVMI Pod15 July 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Weevil Navarro, Francis Capra, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, bus crash, Tessa Thompson, Jackie Cook, Terrence Cook, Jeffrey Sams, Detective Weevil, Detective Logan, Felix’s murder, Felix Toombs, PCHers, Thumper, James Molina, Hector, Patrick Wolff, Jane, Valorie Curry, Miss Dumas, Hannah Griffith, Jessy Schram, Tom Griffith, Rick Peters, Cora, Dana Davis, Ms Hauser, Kari Coleman, JB, Cassidy Casablancas, Kyle Gallner, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Tina Majorino, Mac, Cindy Mackenzie, Corny, Jonathan Chesner, Madison Sinclair, Amanda Noret, Van Clemmons, Duane Daniels, Principal Clemmons, baseball, sportsball, sports, match throwing, gambling, debt, incorporation, carnival, winter carnival, money, theft, sports fans, ejoke-ulate, glitter, Tritons, Kane Scholarship, Magic Mountain, Six Flags, Chekhov’s things, Chekhov’s glitter, hair, haircuts, Ophelia, Weevil’s niece, Thora Birch, Ghost World, cash, banknotes, ball pit, cash box, dunk tank, dude, fluffy snake, video, streakers, slushies, sex workers, flagpole, denouement, shoes, pranks, Sally, cars, Chevy, Impala

VMI 2.12 Rashard and Wallace Go To White Castle transcript

HZ: Uncle Monte doesn't want Rashard to be consorting with girls in case they're leeches, and hits him in the dick to prove his point.
JOY: Helen, has your uncle ever hit you in the dick?
HZ: I've only met my uncle about eight times, and no, he didn't hit me in the dick. He taught me how to make a compass with a piece of string and a pin.
JOY: That's pretty tight. That's way cooler than hitting your nibling in the dick.
HZ: I don't think I've hit any of my niblings in the dick so far.
JOY: Good on you, Helen.

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod7 July 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, bus crash, Tessa Thompson, Jackie Cook, Terrence Cook, Detective Weevil, Detective Logan, Felix’s murder, Felix Toombs, PCHers, Thumper, James Molina, Hector, Patrick Wolff, Chicago, Rashard Rucker, hit and run, cover-up, basketball, Fitzpatricks, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Marcello Thedford, Super Huge Deputy, Liam Fitzpatrick, Robert Fitzpatrick, James Joseph O'Neil, Annie Campbell, Molly Fitzpatrick, Don Lamb, Sheriff Lamb, Michael Muhney, Cliff McCormack, Daran Norris, Gia Goodman, Krysten Ritter, Cassidy Casablancas, Kyle Gallner, Jane, BJ Britt, Uncle Monte Rucker, Sterling Macer Jr, Nathan Woods, Cress Williams, Guy Abruti, Curtis Anderson, Neptune Grand, church, confession, confessional, props, books, Inga, evidence, club, White Castle, limo, fraternity, frat, party, parties, karaoke, Britt Daniel, Spoon, Lars, Curly Moran, smelly bus, Neptune Onlyplace, toga parties, journalists, clubs, tie dye, boobs, uncles, drive through, burgers, cool girl, phones, cellphones, mobile phones, switcheroo, hollow books, Bill O’Reilly, tapes, interviews, priests, catholicism, hymnal, Miss Dumas, rat, dead rat, Woody Goodman, cobbler, pantomime horse, costumes, panto

VMI 2.11 Donut Run transcript

HZ: They could have saved themselves so much time by following legal procedure.
LO DODDS:: Well, even, like they could have made it dramatic, but like why - why is there kidnapping?
HZ: Well, for making it dramatic, Lo. I think you answered your own question there.

Season 2, transcriptVMI Pod23 June 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Detective Weevil, Detective Logan, Felix’s murder, Felix Toombs, PCHers, Duncvonica, Duncan Kane, Teddy Dunn, Meg’s baby, Duncan’s baby, Lilly Manning, Faith Manning, Manning parents, babies, Mexico, Ken Marino, Vinnie Van Lowe, Celeste Kane, Lisa Thornhill, Kendall Casablancas, Charisma Carpenter, Lucy Lawless, FBI, Don Lamb, Sheriff Lamb, Michael Muhney, Deputy Sacks, Brandon Hillock, Cliff McCormack, Daran Norris, CS Keys, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Marcello Thedford, Super Huge Deputy, Neptune Grand, donut, doughnuts, border patrol, Mexican border, kidnapping, kidnap, custody, The Virgin Suicides, Air, soundtracks, breaking up, break-ups, Al Green, The Hollies, shoes, Bootsy, Hector, Patrick Wolff, Planet Zowie, Chekhov’s things, Chekhov’s public breakup, Chekhov’s vacancy, Chekhov’s backpackers, Chekhov’s fortune cookie, Paula Cole, Dawson’s Creek, lineup, jewellery, jewelry, earrings, diamonds, fonts, Bobby Brown, Whitney Houston, long ball, bugged pens, Vinnie Special, callbacks, wigs, disguises, cars, Cupid, Trevor Hale, Chicago, Rashard Rucker, hit and run, cover-up, basketball, Fitzpatricks, Lost, Backup, Sean Friedrich, Kevin Sheridan, passwords, Boat Duncan, toilet office, pizza bagel, Ay Chihuahuas, Xena Warrior Princess

VMI 2.08 Ahoy, Mateys! transcript

HZ: She's angry at Logan as well for carrying a gun, because she's scared that he's gonna get killed. He's in a reckless mood. He was like, "It's all right, the gun's not loaded, and it was a present from Dick's dad." Like, what a comfort.
JOY: First of all, why is Mr Casablancas running around just doling out guns? He's like, "Oh, it's Halloween, trick or treat, here’s a fucking firearm."
HZ: Well he was probably like, "Logan, you're like an extra son to me. Have one of my precious guns." They had a good time at the range. Also maybe he was like, "This is not going to fit through the shredder, you'd better have it."

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod26 May 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Meg Manning, Alona Tal, Duncan Kane, Teddy Dunn, Felix’s murder, Felix Toombs, Brad Bufanda, bus crash, Weevil Navarro, Francis Capra, drugs, Wanna Score Boy, Lucas Grabeel, Marcos Oliveres, Carlos Oliveres, David Barrera, Maria Oliveres, Norma Maldonado, harassment, Danny Boyd, Taylor Sheridan, Tom Griffith, Rick Peters, Liam Fitzpatrick, Rod Rowland, River Stix, Mac, Mac Mackenzie, Cindy Mackenzie, Vice-Principal Clemmons, Van Clemmons, Vincent Clemmons, Butters, Duane Daniels, tattoos, violence, pirate radio, guns, firearms, dreams, dream sequences, Dreaming Duncan, PCHers, Thumper, fighting, stitches, surgery, bars, Lucky Charms, fuckboy, fuccboi, fuccJOI, fuckJOI, sweatpants, Switched At Birth, school TV station, email, photoshop, Ned, neighbours, chocolate milk, fishsticks, fish tank, fish food, reverb mic, microphones, mayhem, aggravated mayhem, torture, LGBTQ, gay, homophobia, ankle tag, ankle monitor, tasers, Ferris wheels, the Zipper, Molly Fitzpatrick

VMI 2.06 Rat Saw God transcript

JOY: What is it about people and twins and threesomes? You ever think about that, Helen?
HZ: Not in a desirous way. I feel like it's a bit disrespectful of the family relationship between them.
JOY: The family relationship, the autonomy… The mystery of twins, and the pain and struggles that we shall never know as two non-twins.
HZ: I have nieces who are twins, but they are ten, so it feels like not the time to talk to them about it.

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod5 May 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Weevil Navarro, Francis Capra, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, bus crash, Gia Goodman, Krysten Ritter, Ryan Hansen, Dick Casablancas, Woody Goodman, Steve Guttenberg, Felix Toombs, Brad Bufanda, Sheriff Lamb, Don Lamb, Michael Muhney, Cliff McCormack, Daran Norris, Clarence Wiedman, Christopher B. Duncan, PCHers, Abel Koontz, Christian Clemenson, sheriff election, sheriff, Felix’s murder, Amelia DeLongpre, Aaron Echolls, Harry Hamlin, Kim Stolz, ANTM, cameos, Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Rat Saw God, Rob Thomas’s novels, guest stars, necklaces, Naked and Afraid, boaters, Ibiza, ice machine, murder, death, money, extortion, disappearance, foam, foam parties, Mike, Dawn, Kane Software, Clarence Wiedman’s office, blazers, German, Tracey Walter, where’s Wallace, EnriqueFreaque69, Carlos Mercado, marked bills, Las Vegas, road trips, Sally Field, favours, favors, Panty Club for Homos, tattoos, dogs in hats, McGruff the Crime Dog, anthropomorphic dogs, Weevil’s grandma, arson, Echolls house, Chekhov’s things, Chekhov’s argyle, cigars, shivs, shanks, jail, evidence, compromising evidence, rats, Palm Pilot

VMI 2.01 Normal is the Watchword transcript

JOY: Do you think that in this context, pantsing refers to just Butters's pants coming down or him getting fully exposed?
HZ: I'm trying to remember what we would have called it in England; it would have had a different name; pants would definitely unambiguously be undergarments in British English.
JOY: Oh right, so you'd be like, "Oh, he got troused" or something. Sorry if I've offended anyone.
HZ: When you've pantsed people in the past, Jenny, which I'm sure actually I'm sure you've never done because you're a kind person.
JOY: Honestly, I'm not a pantser, but Jess pantses me on the daily.
HZ: She romantically pantses you? And when she does it, is it overpants and underpants?
JOY: Just overpants, and then an impish scurrying away.
HZ: So we should clarify: Jess is your girlfriend.
JOY: Yes.
HZ: She's not your high school bully.
JOY: Or a ghost.

transcript, Season 2VMI Pod23 March 2020Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Wallace Fennel, Percy Daggs III, Weevil Navarro, Francis Capra, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, teen, teenage, school, high school, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, season 2, Woody Goodman, Steve Guttenberg, Gia Goodman, Krysten Ritter, bus crash, schoolbus, bus, Naima Mora, cliffs, Meg Manning, Alona Tal, Dick Casablancas, Cassidy Casablancas, Kyle Gallner, Ryan Hansen, Kendall Casablancas, Charisma Carpenter, Duncan Kane, Teddy Dunn, Veronica’s romances, Veronica’s relationships, PDA, book deals, Alica Fennel, Lilly Kane, vertical twigwork, sports, the Neptune Onlyplace, vests, urine, drug tests, schemes, conspiracies, Butters, Kelvin, plots, Keith’s book, Duncvonica, bugs, ladybugs, ladybirds, biscotti, Julie Chen, Happy Duncan, Big Murder Small Town, Felix, Felix Toombs, Brad Bufanda, murder, class war, class tensions, Leo D’Amato, Max Greenfield, Deputy Leo, cute as a bug manager, Godfather III, pisstery, urine samples, parents, Jim Chimory, Boatloads of Fun, pants, pantsing, trousers, pranks, cruelty, jokes, japes, Keithlicia, South Park, Vincent, Clemmons, Vice Principal Clemmons, 69, bad accents, shy bladder, bathrooms, bathroom doors, doors, Shark Field, ANTM, Miss Dumas, PCHers, Sleevil, Cordelia, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Laker Girls, The Shocker, kissing, inappropriate workplace behaviour, Dick, Beaver, sex, affairs, baseball, Terrence Cook, food shaming, relationships, Dirrty, Nelly, Red Socks, Yankees, Johnny Damon, Delays, Long Time Coming, Embrace, Ashes, Kane parents, Jake Kane, Celeste Kane, Kane trial, Napa